The Big Night

Well, the big night is upon us. We have been planning this night for weeks. At some points the stress level was high and I wanted to quit, at other times, I was so excited I couldn't wait for it to be here. Then this week came and as we made final plans, did last minute shopping and worked on details, the excitement level soared. By 10:00 tonight, one of us will be declared the winner of the 2005 Christmas Tree Decorating Contest. The only way I could convince Dan to decorate a tree was to make it a competition. So, the planning began at the beginning of November. We planned and shopped and shopped and shopped looking for just the right ornaments, lights, and garland to decorate our trees. The themes were supposed to be a secret until the final reveal, but the excitement was overwhelming and we gave in and told. Dan's theme is stars. He has 50 stars filling his tree, all gold, silver or red. I went with a more sentimental theme of "My best gifts past and present" there are 25 silver frame ornaments on my tree with black and white pics of my closest family and friends from over the years. Each person with a unique story and something special that they have contributed to my life. I love looking at it, recalling many fond memories. I have filled in with ornaments that are gold, silver and apple green. I was paid the highest complement by numerous people telling me it looked like a pottery barn tree (YAY!). I must admit that there were moments in the planning and decorating that I forgot what Christmas was all about. It's not about the competition and it's not about how nice my tree looks. It's about the Father's outrageous love for His creation and sending His Son as the final sacrifice and payment for my ever messed up life. Praise Him. I will post tomorrow and share about how the night went. And maybe throw some pics on here for you to judge yourself.
In other news, my Christmas shopping ends tomorrow, finally. I just have one more thing to get and then all will be over with! I leave for home and will actually be in Wisconsin a week from right now. I am ready for a break and to be free to do nothing, even though there are a million people that I need to see and catch up with. It will be nice to get away and actually spend Christmas with my family too. I miss WI sometimes.
Cleaning, baking, cooking and wrapping are all screaming for my attention. Let the festivities begin!

On the move

Just when I thought things would settle down for a bit and I was ready to stay in my cozy apartment with a pool in my back yard, it was brought to my attention that with Becca moving out there was no way I could live there by myself. It is kind of a big place for one person. So, I am moving. I was really worried about it. In fact, my life seems like fruit basket upset at the moment, but I know all is well. I started looking for an apartment. What a joyful journey that always proves to be! It is so humbling when you realize that to live in a studio apartment for a year costs almost as much as you are worth. So, I started putting the word out that I needed a place to live for oh about $1.25 a month. Lots of people offered for me to live with them for free, but the problem was that most of them lived 1/2 hour to an hour away from the church and that just wouldn't work for me. So, I tried to pretend that I wasn't going to have to move. The most stressful part was that I kind of needed to know where I was going before I left for China because when I came back, I only had two weeks before my lease was up at the place I am at. So, in the midst of confusion, exhaustion, being overwhelmed and planning a trip, I decided that it will just happen. I talked to my friend Maria about it and cried a lot (things have been unusually emotional around here lately). She called me that night and told me that Jabez (another guy that works here) is going to be done June 1 and has to move out of the house that he is living in that the church owns, so maybe I could move in. The only thing that crossed my mind was that the house had an orange kitchen that I would definitely have to do something about. I told her we would see, but living on the church property? Wow, that's a commitment. I know, beggars can't be choosers, but whatever. So, she came into my office the next day and said she had talked to Tim (our business administrator) about me moving in. He talked to his committee about it and came into my office this morning and asked if I wanted to live there... For REALLY REALLY cheap! So, I have a place to live! YAY GOD! I am kind of excited. Especially since I think I get to paint and stuff, so I get to do my own thing there and decorate and such. Now I just need people to help me move! That won't be a problem now that I have a family here that is taking care of me like my own does at home.
In other news, I had the flu this weekend... NOT FUN. I had a yucky fever and I coughed a lot. I didn't even work on Sunday, which was good because I was super sick. My "East Coast Mom" Kim made me chicken noodle soup that was delightful. I just slept and watched TV for three days. I was ready to get back into the swing of things this morning. I should fill you in on my new family. Well, if you have been reading this blog, you know all about Lizzie. Well, Lizzie's parents have adopted me as their daughter. They have been such a blessing and an answer to many prayers for a family that I can connect with here on the East Coast. They are kind and loving. I really really like them. They are so much fun too! I will write more about them at some other point, but for the time being I need to get back to work. The day is almost done!

Da Dum Da Dum

Well, it looks like another one of my roommates is going to walk down the asile. Hmm... That makes number seven. It is an interesting feeling when you know a roommate is getting married. It is even more interesting when it is someone who has been the big sister that I have always wanted. Rebecca and I connected right away and it has been both a privilege and and honor to live with her, share with her, and go on adventures with her. She is an amazing woman of God and the Lord has blessed her with a man who loves her beyond belief. Whenever she talks about him, it makes me wonder if I can ever find someone that will treat me the way Alex treats Becca. There are other times when I wonder if I could ever tolerate being so valued. It is just kind of beyond my level of comprehension that someone would want to spend time with me and value me highly. But we shall see... I may just be surprised.
In other news, less than three weeks, I will be arriving in China going on an amazing adventure with my good friend Molly. Plus, since Becca is getting married in the fall and is wanting to save money, I have now been released (begrudgingly) to go on another quest to find a place to live. Oh what an adventure. I have 6 weeks to find a place to live, but not only that, I am in China for 2 weeks, leaving me really a month left to find a place to live. This is no new thing to have to move, since this is going to be year number six of frequently finding a new place to live, the thing is that there is really no "back-up" plan. It's not like if I don't find something I can just go home. It's like if I don't find something, it's live in my car, or bring a sleeping bag into my office, which I already spend too much time in. So, we shall see. As I was reminded by a friend today, Father is in control and I don't need to worry about tomorrow or today, or where I will live or whatever. He knows what is best. My struggle right now is that I need to sit still and wait for Him.
Prayer meeting is starting now, so I need to get going, but I need to write once a week, so here we go... Maybe more will come soon... Last weekend was great, I should write about that too... We'll see.

For better or worse

Life Love and Other MysteriesOh what a week. Actually not really at all. This week has been refreshingly slow, until today. I realized that it was Thursday and since tomorrow is my day off, I only had today to get everything ready for Sunday. Don't worry, I got it all done and then some! Sometimes I wonder why I am not an elementary school teacher as I have spent probably 20 hours this week cutting, pasting and laminating things for our kids here. At least it is mindless work for the most part, AND I get to take it home and sit in front of the TV and work. It takes me back to homework days long ago when I would study in front of the TV, only now I am getting paid for it.
My parents were here last week. It is always good to see them. It is so weird that I only see them a few times a year though and they have to come across the country to see me now. Oh well, it was sweet. I took Thursday off and we went to Philly to visit my Dad's Uncle and Aunt. What an experience. I am going to attempt to put into words all that I experienced. Let me start out by saying I hope my great nieces and nephews will see this in my relationship with my husband in 60 years.
My uncle Ken and Aunt Elsie have been married for 63 years. Aunt Elsie, Aunt Lillian and my dad' mom, Elizabeth were all born in Germany and moved here during childhood or their teenage years (a little history for you). Uncle Ken is 86 and Aunt Elsie is 85. They live in a Masonic Home for elderly people. Uncle Ken lives in assisted living and Aunt Elsie has Alzheimer's and lives in the health care area. She is pretty much out of it. We didn't think we were going to see her, assuming she wouldn't understand who we were. So, we just went planning to see Uncle Ken. We went into his room and chatted for a bit before heading to lunch. At various times throughout that initial conversation, he got teary as he talked about Elsie and his routine with her. After lunch, he goes up to her room about 1:30 in the afternoon. He brings her to his room and plays music for her, since she likes that. Then at 2:30, Elsie needs a nap, so he takes her back to her room and sits with her while she sleeps. He stays there til dinner time, when he bids her goodbye until the next afternoon. The thing that got me, though, wasn't his faithfulness to her, although that is definately to be recognized without a doubt. The main thing that struck me was that his face lit up every time he looked at her and talked to her. He always included her in the conversation and looked her in the eye. While he was talking, she would look at him and listen. He would look at her as he was telling a story and say, "hey kid, do you remember that?" This man, who is tired and worn down by life lives for the moments he can spend with his wife. She is by no means the woman that he married personality wise, but for better for worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do they part. He will be with her. What an amazing example of marriage, and a treasured piece of my family heritage. I am so blessed to have a family like I do!

Elizabeth

So, as I was posting my last blog, my side kick, Elizabeth was in my office with me, as is usually the case when she and I are here at the same time. She asked if I had written about her, and I said, no. She of course responded with "why not?" I guess I had never really thought about writing about her, even though she is one of the greatest kids I have ever met. So, this is for Lizzie. I will never forget the day that we were walking down the hall, holding hands and just talking about things (allow me to interject that Lizzie is 8 years old). I don't remember what exactly what we were talking about, but probably something along the lines of wishing we were sisters because we would have so much fun together. And she starts telling me about this one time... before I really knew her or her parents, she had kind of targeted me as someone that was going to be special to her, she said that she would talk about me and tell her parents about me a lot. Her mom responded to her talking about me by saying, "Sounds like Anne (she probably called me Chickadee, my new nickname) is your role model." Wow, it may not seem like it, but it was a powerful moment for me. Never before, really, except with the Miller kids, have I been "pegged" as someone's role model. This has become a very serious thing. As I look back to role models that I had growing up, I studied very carefully every move they made, amazed at the grace that exhibited in so many areas. I wanted to be just like them. I hung on their every word. I followed their example in every arena that I saw. Without knowing it, they laid a foundation for what I wanted to become. And here I am, still feeling like a little girl on the inside, but nevertheless, 23 years old, a role model to this precious little girl. Who hangs on every word I say, every move I make and every where I go, she wants to go(even China). It is an honor that I no longer take for granted. This girl has been an amazing source of joy, laughter and inspiration to me. She, through her respect of me has called me to a higher form of living. I love that we can just look at each other and laugh and laugh and laugh, but then that there are times, that she allows me access into her life through being able to pray with her and just hang out. She says that the best day of her life will be April 8 or 9 (we haven't decided yet) when I take her out to this place called "Claydate" to paint pottery, since she is an artist in the making. That makes me laugh, but it also makes me feel totally loved that this little girl loves me so much! Here's to you, Lizzie.

Life Love and Other Mysteries

This Holy Week has been a struggle for me. Part of it just doesn’t seem that it is time for Easter in the yearly calendar already. We just got done with Christmas and things were starting to feel calm, then BAM! Start planning Easter week things. I have been mulling over not only the sacrifice of our Lord, but really the pivotal point that it was in the church. I know that that idea is so ordinary, but recently it has really reached out and grabbed my attention.
Growing up, Easter was always my favorite holiday and there is no reason for it being my favorite. There were no strong family traditions tied with it. Maybe because it was always a great time to kick off the spring wardrobe with a new outfit (I must admit that I fell into that line of thinking last weekend as I spent two afternoons in three different malls). Maybe it was the great fellowship and big breakfasts that proved to produce awesome times of fellowship with church families. Maybe it was the memories of the cakes in the shape of a lamb that my Grandma Bea made while she was alive. Needless to say, here I am, yet another first in my 23 years of living; my very first Easter away from all the familiarities of Cedarburg, Alliance Bible Church and Pastor Bill’s ever appropriate “Easter sermons”.
I sit here in my office on Maundy Thursday waiting for the Holy Communion Service to begin. It has only been since going to college that I even knew there was a Maundy Thursday, let alone knowing that there is a service that involved communion. But I guess if I think about it, it really makes sense. What to make of this new tradition, I don’t know, but I hope to know by the end of the evening (if I don’t have to do nursery duty). Tomorrow is Good Friday. I am actually excited about it because here at Black Rock we don’t have a Good Friday service. Why we have Maundy Thursday and no Good Friday is a good question. My assumption and answer to all my questioning why things are done this was is “this is the way it has always been done.” The cool thing is that I am free to visit another church in New York that I otherwise do not have any time to visit due to my confining work hours on Sunday mornings. Saturday starts 4 services for Easter all of which I am working. Part of me is selfish and bitter because I am not going to be able to celebrate Easter with the “grown ups” and I get to do 4 different egg hunts. The other part of me thinks that this is ok because I get to point kids to Jesus in a way that hopefully they will understand. Maybe Easter will become the favorite holiday for some kids because they will have met Jesus for the first time. That would make it all the more worth it.
Ok, back to this new line of thinking. I have been listening to Louie Giglio speak recently. Let me start off by saying that I really appreciate this man, the heart that he has and his relationship with the Father. Anyway, his talks along with my own journey have lead me to this deeper understanding that everything that I do should be done only to bring glory to Him. I was created to reflect His light and by no means was I created to be the source of Light that He is. It all came together last week when I heard Andy Stanley speak. By no means will I say this as perfectly as he put it, but he basically said the following: God, in response to humanities attempt to hijack His glory responded in the most unorthodox way by sending His Son to die. Basically to prove that HE DESERVES THE GLORY regardless of what we do. His righteous response to our complete lack of understanding was to come and walk among us, never holding over us His Lordship. A humble servant came and in response to a broken world, offered himself up so that we may live. Not only did he offer himself up, he defeated death and rose so that we may live again with Him. May that be the real idea of Easter. May the thought of His Glory captivate me and motivate me to live for Him and bring glory to His name and His renown. Many blessings.

Life Love and Other Mysteries

Well, Here I am, back and finally into the swing of things here in CT. My trip to Atlanta was amazing. I was a little worried about the conference, who I was going with and if we would have anything to talk about for 6 days. Believe it or not, we did! We had a great time and it was great to get into a closer relationship with Linda. It is so nice when you as a leader can get to know your lay people and know their stories and perspective on things. We visited NorthPoint Community Church, which is um. AMAZING! It was such a great way to start the week and get a little glimpse of where Black Rock is headed as we ave bought some of their curriculum and going into a new building project. The conference started off a little shakey, but by the time it was over, I knew why I was there and that I had learned a ton.
I was also able to see Paul and Art while I was down there, which made my trip even better. Those guys are so amazing. It is so exciting to see the Lord working in their lives and to see the adventure they are on and hear the dreams that they have. They are SO AMAZING! It was such a blessing to have them speak Truth into my life and hopefully I was able to do the same for them. I can't wait til they move to New York and I get to see them more often.
Well, Sunday kicks off a three ring circus here at Black Rock with baptizm, kids singing, and pony rides as we kick off Holy Week, followed my Maunday Thursday services and four Easter Services. It is going to be interesting not being in Mequon for Easter, but White Plains here I come for another holiday! WooHoo! Well, I need to get back to work. Only a few hours left in the day!